I figured it was time to write part 2 of this reflection. I have had so many thoughts and memories of lifegroup, of community, some seem more distant and some seem so close. Before I tell you about my most recent journey with my beautiful lifegroup, I think I should talk about my views about community. Ever since I was exposed to the idea of "community", it felt just like the way life should be. sharing life. sharing the good, the bad, the ugly. forgiving. loving. struggling. accountability. sharing resources. serving together. diverse people. differences. and lots of laughter. I have enjoyed many of these moments with my college roommates in the inner city of Tampa. I was young back then, though. I was immature. I was broken and didn't know it. and things didn't always work out and it made me think that maybe I wasn't supposed to be in community. maybe it wasn't made for everyone. so I withdrew.
it's funny how things work out, huh? as I started to develop new friendships and meet those around me, and we formed in a bible study together, I didn't naturally associate this with 'community', as I knew it to mean. I also began a job where I was charged with engaging family and other supportive adults to connect with kids in the foster care system. the importance of group, of connections. In Psalm 68, it says that "God sets the lonely in families..." I believe that with all my heart. And not only do I believe that for the foster children I work with, but I believe that for myself. I had always thought that community were people that are pretty similar as you, in thought and interests, etc. I suppose this is true in a sense. However, I was always caught off guard when I turned around one day and realized that the people were around me, who were incredibly different from me, were my family, my true community. In fact, realizing that I had the people around me who I know were in it for the long haul. In Family Finding work we call this the "lifetime network". Unconditional supports. The people available at 2am. The people exposed to the worst part of yourself and yet respond with overwhelming grace and mercy. How could I have overlooked these people in some moments of my life, I am not sure, but I have them now. In fact, these are the people who have freed me to go back and reconcile with prevoius people in my life and that has been unbelievably healing. I have realized that in many ways, being in a group, leading a group, has been God's saving grace for me.
My commitment to these people, my weekly meeting with them, and my witnessing of our changes as individuals as a group has had an everlasting effect on my life. These things have kept me out of trouble, got me out of trouble, brought me into honest reflection into who I am as a woman, what my strengths and obvious weaknesses are, pushed me closer to Jesus, and allowed me to learn to love with a certain vulnerability that only can come with a safe group of people. Watching our lifegroup struggle back in forth from 3 to 5 people up to a steady group of 9-10 people was proof of this beautiful thing I call community. As one of my best friends put it, my lifegroup is a true reflection of the power of groups, the power of community, and the power of God's work in relationships and family. What can I say? I'm a believer. It's possible. It's possible that broken people can recover, can be a part of other's healing processes, and that people living life with others have the possibility of leading far more enriching lives than those without others. We weren't meant to be alone, that is not a new concept, I just didn't realize how much of an impact this would have on my life, with the most unexpected people.
No comments:
Post a Comment